Tag Archives: Spirituality

We Determine Happiness, Just As We Determine What To Eat

We Determine Happiness, Just As We Determine What To Eat

It’s very simple! Just as we determine what we want to eat, we also have power and control over when we want to be happy. I’ve learned this over the last few weeks when I started accepting that life sucks and I was dealt this awful hand in life, with a mental illness. But you know what I discovered? I have control over this illness and I also have control over if I allow it to bring me down, or allow it to change my outlook. Look, I get and understand how difficult it is to bring yourself to an idea such as mine. I get it. But not trying and just continuing to head down a path of self-destruction, well, that isn’t a path to take. Get it out. Get loud. Get angry. Be pissed off. Let those emotions out and you’ll find clarity at the end of the horrible tunnel, the tunnel that I myself was trapped in for quite some time. Just know that you’re not alone and that you can make it through this. You just have to believe in your strength, and allow yourself the power to be happy, and feel great about yourself. Trust me, it won’t be easy, but it’s recovery, and if I’ve learned anything about recovery, it’s this: Recovery Is Possible! Not every day is going to be happy, so don’t get discouraged and let down, just because of one sour thought or person or day. The battle against your thoughts and your mind is a battle that you were born to win. So accept that there’s something wrong, accept that life sucks and accept that you’ll have to fight like hell just to be happy. Once you accept it, once you finally tell yourself that you have the power to alter your thoughts, and override your own mind, well, that’s when you can finally be happy. So get the help you need, reach out to the people you trust, and tell yourself EVERY DAY, “I’m Possible”.

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Posted by on May 5, 2015 in Uncategorized


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Hiding Behind a Wall of Perfection

Hiding Behind a Wall of Perfection

It’s never easy to keep it together all the time. The expected notion of staying calm and pretending like nothing is bothersome. Well, NEWSFLASH! It’s not working. This is an area in which I like to call hiding behind a wall of perfection. Have you ever had a friend, coworker, or even a family member ask you what’s wrong? Did you truly believe that they REALLY, 100% wanted to actually know what was wrong with you? There are some odds betting that they really did not want to hear it. It’s human nature to ask a person, who in our terms isn’t their normal self, the question of what’s going on. As you are trying to hold onto that wall of perfection, you start to lose grip, and reality begins to hit. Deep down inside of you, somewhere, is a broken soul. So damaged beyond repair. You walk around with your heart on your shoulder, presenting this tough interior, when really, you’re about to collapse, and fall really hard. Emotions are tricky, and a lot of what we do, we tie our emotions into it. You might think that without your emotions, you won’t have to feel the pain. As it is true, it is also true that you won’t feel the good times. Your Doctor, Therapist, and even your Parents, they don’t understand. No matter how hard you try to express your pain, they can’t. For one simple reason: It’s your journey. You’re the one that’s supposed to understand. I could go on and on about how great life is, which it is, but I want to stress the importance of the pain you must deal with, as for it creates who you are. Trust me, I’ve been there, and to this day, will still find myself there at times. But let me tell you this: Life is a gift. How you choose to use it is up to you.

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Posted by on February 12, 2015 in Uncategorized


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Posted by on January 27, 2015 in Uncategorized


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The Past

The Past
created by Jacob Michael White

The walls from my past came crashing down,

the tragic events made a pound.

Continuing to bleed from inside,

and my beating heart you shall hide.

The memories od yesterday’s’s untold pain,

a venture you sought through the rain.

A windowpane you shattered in this,

with my cry so distressed it sure was a miss.

Tomorrow’s yesterday is the futures past,

Oh, how it happens all so fast.

I cannot undo what has been done,

the price you shall pay is to always run.

Burry me in dirt on my past grave,

but please don’t save me, Knave.

The dark red blood that drips from your soul,

It’s too late, please become whole.

The past was then and the future is next,

for the rest of life, you will become perplexed.

Try and forget who you are,

you will always become one with the star.

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Posted by on January 14, 2015 in Uncategorized


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To Write Love On Her Arms

So the other day I came across a trailer presented by the organization To Write Love On Her Arms and was blown away that another film on addiction and mental illness will be released. For those of you who have Netflix, there is a movie titled, ‘Call Me Crazy’. It’s a five feature film, from a woman suffering schizophrenia to a woman experiencing Severe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It’s a wonderful film, and I highly recommend to anyone. It is surely a life changer. Makes you appreciate the struggles you don’t face. Best part of the film, Brittany Snow stars in it.

Now that I completely went off subject, To Write Love On Her Arms seems to be about a girl who is suffering from Bipolar Disorder, and as an addiction problem. That’s from what I’ve gathered in the trailer. So who will be seeing the film?

Here’s To Write Love On Her Arms Trailer:

Here’s Call Me Crazy Trailer:


Posted by on January 7, 2015 in Uncategorized


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Why I’m in Recovery

Hi, my name is Jacob Michael White, and I’ve been in recovery for about 5 years now. A few months ago, if you were to ask me what recovery means to me, I wouldn’t have known what to say. If you were to tell me 5 years ago that I would start a blog on recovery, I would’ve laughed. If you ask me what led me to finally stop, and smell the roses, and start my path to recovery, I would tell you this:

I was tired of feeling like a failure, and felt that I was going nowhere with my life. Upon graduating high school, I had everything figured out to a tee, but then I let my illness define who I am, and the rest piled up from there. It was a long and depressing road. What changed me 2 months ago was being hospitalized for the third time in my life. This time was different though. This time I accepted that I was sick, and learned that I helped myself get there. I realized that things needed to change. So I started to make those changes possible, and therefore I created this blog, a guide to living in recovery. Which has helped on so many levels.

Since finding recovery, my life is actually a good one. I enjoy it. There are times when my bipolar symptoms get the best of me, but through therapy, I’m constantly learning to manage those vicious attacks from my mind.

A wise professional once told me, the only way you are going to continue to stay positive, and have less of your illness control your life is to simply just do it. In better words to understand this, just live your life, and enjoy it. The rest will follow.

At that moment, I realized that recovery is my option, and I am going to do recovery the best way I can, which is by attending therapy, getting medicine regulated and being social. Speaking up and reaching out has saved my life numerous times.

So if being on six different medicines and having to attend therapy makes you feel week, don’t let it. I’m an example of success and let me tell you, recovery is possible.


Posted by on January 3, 2015 in Uncategorized


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Why Everybody’s Depression is Different

Why is everybody’s depression different? The answer you may be looking for might surprise you; Each individual is different, and what they go through will be different. No two people are alike. Our minds our wonderous things and we often view them as either a curse or a blessing.

Below are three different stories, in which shows you that each person’s depression is different:

Albert’s Story: I started getting depressed around age 11. I missed 15-30 days of school a semester from junior high through high school. The funny thing is, I didn’t know what was wrong at the time, which resulted in denial for years. Now I am 28 years old and am seeking professional help. I didn’t want to admit that I needed help. I wanted to do it myself.

Sally’s Story: I was in a way relieved when the doctor said my problem was depression because I thought something was really wrong. Depression, which was affecting my colon and gut—and it really worried me there because my dad died of cancer and I have lots of cancer in my family. But when I thought about what the doctor said, I realized that, yes, I am depressed.

Ben’s Story: Everything was going wrong. I was under a lot of pressure and stress. My shoulders started aching, and I got muscle spasms across my back. There was no reason for it. I’m usually very positive, but I wasn’t being rational. I noticed I wasn’t getting things done either.

As you can see, depression will affect everyone differently, which brings on different struggles and life stories.

Remember, with anything that involves the mind, be patient. It’s not going to happen overnight. With time and therapy, you just might find yourself improving your health. What are you going to do today, that will impact tomorrow?

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Posted by on December 27, 2014 in Uncategorized


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