Just this week, I started attending a Depression Group, and in this first week of gaining insight on a whole new perspective, I learned that I don’t have control over what happens in my life, but what I do have control over is how I process my reaction, and what I decide to do about it. I read a short section from the handout and gained a whole new understanding on what I’ve been doing wrong this entire time; Applying too much energy into getting better, while exhausting myself. I learned real quick that this is simply not the way to heal.
I’m sitting in a quiet room, in a peaceful little hotel hidden back among the pine trees. It’s just past noon, late July, and I am listening to the desperate sounds of a life-or-death struggle going on a few feet away. There’s a small fly burning out the last of its short life’s energies in a futile attempt to fly through the glass of the windowpane. The whining wings tell the poignant story of the fly’s strategy: Try harder. But it’s not working. The frenzied effort offers no hope for survival. Ironically, the struggle is part of the trap. It is impossible for the fly to try hard enough to succeed at breaking through the glass. Nevertheless, this little insect has staked its life on reaching its goal through raw effort and determination. The fly is doomed. It will die there on the windowsill. Ten steps away, the door is open. Ten seconds of flying time and this small creature could reach the outside world it seeks. With only a fractions of the effort now being wasted, it could be free of this self-imposed trap. The breakthrough possibility is there. It would be so easy. Why dosen’t the fly try another approach, something dramatically different? How did it get so locked in on the idea that this particular route and determinded effort offer the most promise for success? What logic is there in continuing, until death, to seek a breakthough with more of the same? No doubt this approach makes sense to the fly. Regrettably, it’s an idea that will kill.
From this selected text, I now know that trying harder isn’t necessarily the solution. Putting it in other terms, if you try so hard to free yourself from something, and putting too much effort into an idea that isn’t panning out, you’ll find yourself burnt out in no time, and with that being said, you won’t have the breakthrough, and you won’t succeed.